Back By Popular Demand

I have decided to continue with the blog after much deliberation. Okay there really wasn’t much deliberation, it was more like a few die hard fans whining and begging. Okay not exactly fans but more like my momma and an aunt who used to drive a rather largish van full of innocent, yet snotty little children, like a bat outta hell, and not so much whining and begging but in my head that is exactly how it went. lol What can I say I have a flair for dramatics in the comfort of my own warped mind. Honestly I just kind of missed writing. So I will try to post something every now and then. The antics from the Munich trip will come in installments as there is just so much to write about. So read on and enjoy!

So what have you all missed out on, let’s see here. Well the weekend of September 25 we went to Munich to visit with our friend Stefan. We left Friday morning on the train from Coburg with a transfer in Nuremberg. While we waited on the platform for the train in Coburg we already had an idea as to how this journey would go. Just a few yards away from us sat a father, a teenage son and a set of rotten four or five year old twin boys. These little boogers were misbehaving from the word go. They were running around the platform whipping their jackets at one another like deadly weapons and flinging water from their water bottles all over. Now do you think that their dear old daddikins did anything about it? Well if you guessed that he did, then you would be sadly mistaken. Dad just sat their like a useless fatty growth that goes completely unnoticed by the world at large, including his horrible children. So the train arrives and we decide to go find seats on the upper level in hopes of having a better view. Well we did get a better view of the scenery and were in earshot of the terrible twosome who also ended up sitting on the upper level, much to my dismay. I’m sure it does not take much imagination to guess how the rest of the journey went. There was a lot of yelling and screaming and crying. There was also a lot of running and jumping in general. Then to make matters worse the darn air line decided to go and pop off the train. Yes I know, this is a very comforting fact. This incident really instilled a great amount of faith in the Deutschebahn system as far as I was concerned. So we were on the train with the Satanic Doublemint Twins much longer than necessary.

Now this is the point where I must warn all of you innocents who actually are silly enough to think that I would ever get off so easy as to have to only contend with something so mild as the SDT’s (Satanic Doublemint Twins), that there was much more to come. Much more annoying and potentially dangerous things that we were to encounter on this journey to Munich. Things or persons if you dare, that would seriously jeopardize my squeaky clean record of never having any dealings with the law enforcement of any of the countries I have resided in.

So that brings me to the Nuremberg train station, which is actually quite delightful since they have these lovely pay toilets called “Mc Clean,” where a weary traveler can have access to an astonishingly clean (we are talking Bates standard clean), toilet, sink and even a shower, for a small fee of course. I assure you that it is worth every penny to go about your potty business in a clean fresh smelling place in which you have no worry of catching something from the doorknob. However, my sheer joy over my squeaky clean throne was short lived. For not long after we found our seats on our connecting train we realized how crowded it was going to be. In fact it was so crowded that people were standing in the aisles. Thankfully after a few stops they found seats which was particularly comforting because some creepy old man was standing, well more like leaning over my seat. That my friends is only the beginning of the story sadly. So things began to get interesting when we noticed, well more like heard, the large group of loud unruly teenagers on the train. These were no ordinary teenagers though. They were German teenagers, which means that at the ripe old age of sixteen these fine upstanding responsible (I use these terms very sarcastically as you will soon find out) young people are entitled by law to legally purchase and consume beer, not alcohol just yet because that would be ridiculous in comparison, but beer. Which you guessed it, does in fact contain, ALCOHOL. Go figure. So before the train even left the station these kids had already began consuming the numerous crates of beer they had brought along with them, and yes, apparently this is allowed. So I am sure you can all imagine that they continued to drink throughout the train ride and became sloppy ass drunk in no time. One boy in particular, who was loud to start with, became louder and louder with each drink he took. So of course he had to yell his friends name “Maxi! Maximillion!” over and over. I was listening to my I-Pod with the volume cranked and I could still hear everything he said. You could tell that everyone on the train car was sick these kids. I was particularly way over them when the infamous and particularly drunk Maxi began to stumble down the aisle to retrieve another beer most likely. Maxi was not simply just wobbling and stumbling he also had a distinct look on his face that I have seen on the face of many a person about to vomit. I sat there in fear as he approached with his squinty intoxicated eyes and his tightly closed mouth and inflated cheeks. I turned to Marshall and informed to be prepared, for if Maxi fell or threw up on me, that I would definitely be going to jail for assault and battery. Luckily and to Marshall’s and my relief, Maxi did not barf on me. Thank god! So after a few more beers, many cheers, numerous rounds of seat swapping, and a whole lot of yelling we reached Munich at long last. Marshall and I were never so relieved. However that was not the end of our escapades with the beer drenched children. We decided it would be a swell idea to stay seated until most of the people had exited the train so as not to have to battle our way out. Well we came to realize that that had been a very bad idea for we were stuck behind the drunken bunch who got off the train and got back on once they realized that they had forgotten all of their crates of beer and luggage. So there was chaos and Marshall had had enough so he used our suitcase as a shield of sorts in which to push the little turds out of the way and off the train. I was never so proud of Marsh. It took all I had to not fall over as I was laughing so hard at his little outburst of frustration. Hey, I had to enjoy it as it happens to rarely.

More of the story to come! I will send out an e-mail letting you know when.